Day 8: A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life
This is going to rub a lot of people the wrong way, but before you start to judge me I want you to ready the entire blog post. Then if you feel so inclined judge me. I don’t care. So here it is. The last time I felt the most satisfied with my life was when I made my last child support payment. See.. You’re starting to judge me already. Just read the rest of the post.
You see my now ex-wife got pregnant when we were only nineteen years old. Our marriage didn’t last due to her cheating. That’s another story. Anyway, I didn’t get to see my daughter get born. It hurt badly. There was even a point when I didn’t know if she was mine. It wasn’t until I seen her sleeping as a baby. She rolled over in her crib and tucked one hand under her little pillow and put the other one over it. That is the exact way I slept then and still do today.
You may be wondering what this has to do with anything. Well, it was me who told my ex to go after child support. I felt like it was my way of taking care of her since I couldn’t be there. It didn’t turn out the way I had hoped. I was paying support, but thanks to the laws in the state she lived in, that didn’t give me any rights to see my daughter.
Flash forward 19 years, my daughter has finally graduated high school and I am getting ready to make my last support payment. I had two thoughts at the time. First I thought I was free. I could finally live my life free. The second and more important thought I had, and this one hit me hard, was that in my own little way I had helped raise my daughter. I know, paying support doesn’t mean I raised her. Anyway, there you have it. Judge me if you must.